Denying the Obvious
This photo was taken yesterday afternoon before Jayde's doctor's appointment. As always, we have been trying to steal every happy moment possible, even though they have become few and far between. I mark my calendar with each new episode, wishing I could erase that particular day. Last night was Jayde's fifth SMAS episode in thirty-six days. Denying the obvious is no longer an option for any of us. The short-lived reprieve from her illness was a blessing and a curse. She is angry, frustrated, afraid, sad, and on the verge of giving up as she exclaims, "I don't want to live like this. This is not living!" She is right. She has experienced a brief taste of what her life should be like and desperately wants it back. I hold onto her as I hold back my tears, "It is understandable for you to feel hopeless, but know I will never give up on you. I will never give up hope." Next Friday, Jayde will have multiple scans performed to see what has changed. Th...