The Idea of Giving Up Is Not An Option
There they are, the words I am not supposed to utter. Nonetheless, the unspeakable phrase comes rushing out of my mouth, much like a dam that has broken. Fortunately, my daughter and I are at opposite ends of the house. She is safely out of earshot when I screech, “I GIVE UP!” I am unable to re-cork my explosion of words. Instantly regretting my emotionally charged outburst, it becomes a cloud of guilt cascading over me like a waterfall. Though it can be daunting, caring for a chronically ill child requires you to keep your wits and maintain composure whenever possible. You learn to master the art of squashing the varying emotions deep below the surface. Even when it feels almost impossible, somehow, you learn to figure it out, and it becomes your new norm. I walk out onto our deck, allowing the necessary tears to fall, collecting myself before re-entering our home. A few days before my outburst, I sat in our living room with my phone on speaker, discussing the latest ...